5 Lessons
         Kids Need To Learn
Kids is a broad term.
 When I think ‘kids’ I think toddlers to High School Seniors. 
 When I think of the 5 lessons
         every kid needs to learn, I think of 5 Life Lessons that will help him/her grow emotional resilience and maturity, because without that nothing
         else will matter.
 Therefore, I offer the following lessons in developmental sequence.
 #1. We can help kids
         learn   how to share their possessions, their time, and their friendship.
         Learning to share with another child less fortunate fosters empathy. Learning to sharing
         generates generosity and openness of spirit.  Learning to share also establishes that
         a child does not exist solo, is  part of a larger entity and connected by common goals and events.  Learning to share helps
         a child understand that he/she can survive  giving up part of a whole. And the ability to give away total ownership  develops
         emotional resilience as well as trust that
         there will always be more to have and to share.
 #2. We can help kids learn  how to care for themselves
         and keep physically safe. Learning the skills necessary to avoid physical danger helps nurture instincts.  Picking up cues from people and situations, following important safety  rules, and making it a
         habit to have healthy suspicions of strangers  will aid in discerning positive from negative environments, as well as  ill
         intentioned individuals when kids are older and out on their own.  Learning how to reach out for help, deal with unexpected
         emergencies  will add to a child’s feeling that he/she can survive and overcome, and  build his/her self-confidence.
 #3. We can help kids learn  how to take responsibility for their actions and
         decisions. Learning to take responsibility helps form analytical thought as well as patience.  If kids spend all their allowance at once, they will have to live
         with  that decision even if they quickly lose interest in their choice. They  might think differently next time and wait for
         a bigger, better option. A  child needs to develop patience in order to weigh options and think  through a decision. Learning
         to take responsibility also teaches cause and effect  and that there are consequences
         to behavior and actions. Are they  really willing to pay the consequences for their actions and/or their  decisions?
 Allowing kids to make small decisions and take responsibility for the consequences, also teaches  sacrifice-what  are they willing to give
         up for their choice? Are they willing to trade  some fun activities in order to practice; some vacations in order to  compete;
         some candy in order to buy something for another family member  or friend’s birthday, or some free time in order to
         walk their dog?
 And finally, taking responsibility develops  strength of character. It will teach kids how to admit to and learn
         from mistakes. Taking responsibility means facing truth and overcoming fear of reaction and guilt Learning how not to run away or avoid, lie or cheat, try to cover or
         blame creates a foundation of ethics. And, if a child can own up to a failing or to
         a misdeed, he/she is beginning the climb towards emotional maturity. 
 #4. We can help kids learn  how to navigate tough choices and make
         tough decisions.  A tough decision is a right and/or necessary decision, but usually at  some cost. When to report
         a friend? When to refuse to engage in a  particular peer activity? When to say no to getting into a car? There  are right
         answers to these questions, but they remain hard choices. Most  teens will have to face at least one. The more practice kids
         have  making tough decisions, the stronger they become emotionally. 
 #5. We can help kids learn  how to establish
         firm bottom lines.  Kids need to put a value on their beings and bodies,
         understand the  loss of control and privacy when drunk or high. They need to learn to  recognize when a boyfriend/girlfriend
         is no longer a positive influence;  when ‘group think’ becomes dangerous; when a relationship is  controlling
         rather than loving; and what to do when someone has crossed  their bottom line. They need to begin to define who they are,
         have  respect for themselves and work towards having the courage to defend and  protect what they believe to be important
         and just.
 If very young children  learn to share; if school age kids nurture instincts and keep physically safe;
         if early adolescents have practice taking responsibility for actions and decisions;
         if older teens tackle tough choices; and if graduating seniors define firm bottom lines before they turn 18 and/or go off to college, then ‘kids’ will be empathetic and just, self-confident and active,
         emotional resilient and optimistic upon entering
         young adulthood.
 Margo Judge 
 MomOpinionMatters.Com
ERcoaching
Emotional Resilience & Readiness for Enduring Success
margo@ERcoaching.com